


of the past

by Cumberbatch Critter (ivelostmyspectacles)



Series: Fe!MC/Ryuji named their son Goro and this is their story [25]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: F/M, Fe!MC, Genderswap, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 12:46:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15437361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivelostmyspectacles/pseuds/Cumberbatch%20Critter
Summary: It's time Ryuji comes to terms with his son's name. Because he sure as hell doesn't want to end up like his own father, that's for sure.





	of the past

“You know, you could help instead of just shedding your hair everywhere.”

“Hey, that’s not my fault!” Morgana’s ear twitched, and then he purred as though he’d had a sudden idea. Which he had, evidently, since he continued a second later. “Why don’t you brush me? It’ll help the shedding.”

“You know the girls do that crap,” Ryuji muttered. “Why would you want me to, anyway? Last time you said Goro did a better job than I did!”

“That’s because he did.”

“He’s not even three months old!”

Now Morgana’s whiskers twitched. He curled his tail around feet. “Which goes to say a lot about your talents.”

“What did you say?!”

“Ryuji,” Akira laughed, gesturing to the laundry basket. “He’s just riling you up so he can sneak into the clean laundry unnoticed.”

“It’s so waarrrmm…”

“Keep your paws off,” Ryuji grumbled, swiping a shirt from the pile to fold.

Their banter was in good nature, never changing. It never would, Akira thought, and she was happy with that. This had been her life. Morgana, Ryuji, now her son… Goro… speaking of him…

“You’ve gotten more comfortable saying his name lately, haven’t you?”

Ryuji stopped, hands stilling over the laundry. He looked between Morgana and Akira, and then back to scowl at Morgana. _“Seriously?”_

“You said, I didn’t! You’ve got such a big mouth, Ryuji.”

Her own hands smoothing out a few wrinkles on the shirt she’d just folded, Akira found she was the one in the dark now. “What?”

“Nothin’…”

Something _that_ wasn’t a surprise, but she wouldn’t push him. Not on this, not on Goro– it had always been a sensitive subject from the moment she had suggested it. It was so much harder for Ryuji than he let on, she knew. She was grateful for that, every single day.

But still… on that regard, it hadn’t been hard to _notice_ how hard it was, in the beginning. The first month had been horrible. She could have probably counted on two hands how many times Ryuji had said _Goro_ when addressing their son. Guilt, and regret, and lingering anger and betrayal for everything that had happened but it wasn’t the _same_ Goro… and now it seemed like it was getting easier to stomach that. There wasn’t the _pause_ before he said the name now.

So yeah, she was grateful and she was _proud,_ damn it.

“You don’t have to talk about it you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s just…” He frowned down at the laundry. And then looked up at her. “I was bein’ stupid, about all of it.”

“Tell me about it,” Morgana mumbled.

“Hey, did I ask for any help from the peanut gallery?!” he fired back, throwing the shirt at him.

Akira wouldn’t let their antics distract her, not right now. “Ryuji?” she prompted, leaning forward slightly.

He sighed. “Yeah, yeah, so… man, this sucks, because you’ve been telling me it from the beginning but I was too stupid to listen. I had a… dream, the other night, I guess.”

“A dream?”

“Like… kinda like I’d end up like my old man,” he muttered.

“That would never happen.” The response was immediate, but _honest–_ she had never known him and had never wanted to. There was no lost love between them. Even though she didn’t know him, she knew _enough._ And Ryuji, for all of his occasional brash, loud, or awkward ways of doing things? Would _never_ be like him. He was too kind, and caring, and thoughtful and loving and _selfless._ Every reason she loved him; everything Akira figured his dad hadn’t been.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, but couldn’t it?” He wasn’t looking at her again, and she wanted to lean forward and kiss him and reassure him, but it was also equally important that he _say_ this. Because it was having an impact on him. It had _been_ having an impact on him. “Like… in this dream, Goro was older and… I never really got over the name and that all came out shitty… me and him fought and all that, so… if I never changed that, who’s to say I wouldn’t end up like my dad? I’d be pushing my son away, unintentionally, but…”

“But…” Akira said softly, and continued for him. “You decided you didn’t want it to be like that.”

“Yeah.”

“Well.”

He glanced up at her. “Well… what?”

“Well, then you’re not like your dad at all,” she finished, leaning back on the sofa. “If you were, you wouldn’t have actually made the conscious decision that you cared enough. Even if it’s just a possibility, you decided to act upon it and you’ve already changed for it.”

“Yeah?” Ryuji lifted his chin a little more, and Akira wondered if he knew he had the puppy dog eyes going on. Probably not. “You think it can make that much of a difference?”

“Of _course_ it can. You made a choice. That’s more than your dad ever did.”

“Oh, no, he made his choice,” he muttered. “I just… don’t want to do anything that’ll hurt Goro. Which I probably will, somehow, anyway, but…”

Akira smiled wryly, picking up the laundry basket. “I’m sure he’ll say we’ve ruined his life the first time we don’t let him go to a sleepover or something.”

Ryuji snorted, getting to his feet. “Yeah, probably. Or parties. Or not letting him do stuff we did at his age.” He took the laundry basket from her. “I’m okay with that, though. Ma did that to me and I still love her.”

“It’s completely natural for parents to ruin their kids lives that way, isn’t it?” she joked, leaning up to kiss his cheek.

“Yeah, like, it _has_ to happen. Goro’s gonna love us.”

“He will, dear.” She wasn’t joking, then. There were missteps to be had and she was sure they’d both hit them along the way, but they were _both_ going to be good parents. They both had firsthand experience on how _not_ to be, after all. “He will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Another for Pan! I'm so terrible at posting these things on here sjfiorkslfrw forgive my slowness


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